Gimme W-A-L-*-M-A-R-T.....

SO if you looke down this page you will see an entry entitled "Jobs". That was about people mistaking me for someone who works somewhere when i actually dont....well this is about the same gorsh dern thing..

People..let me break it down in layperson term....

I ....Dont....Work...AT ......F'n.........Walmart

I was in there the other day buying swank thangs for my swank apartment...(reach my publicist and she'll set up a tour for you...) and 5 count'em 5 morons asked me where something was located in the store. Not asking to be friendly or i looking like a guy that might know what is actually happening inside that

• illegal alien job supplying
• devilish mom and pop killin,
• economy boostin,
• daughter cheatin,
• blue smock wearin,
• 5 gallon bucket of mayonaise'n (the light kind),
• bourgeiose,
• addictin of a store.

But they asked because i Looked liked i worked there.

Clothes i Had on until later that night when the pizza dilivery GIRL came over:

Carhartt frikin pants, and a T-shirt. Lets just say i was screaming walmart employee in that get up...

QUestions they asked:

Do you know where the toasters are? Reply- In the toaster isle

Do you know where the extension cords are. Reply - By the hygiene products...the feminine kind

Do you know where the crack spakle is? Reply - In my shorts

Do you know where the 5/8 Claw Hammer Wrench Torque Converters are....Reply- Yes I do.

And the 5th and final Q was ....Do you know (cut them off here)....Reply - No...but your mom does!

Then i left...and found 5 dollars in the parking lot.